Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Dear (ha!) Mother Nature:

I would like to take this opportunity to inform you that you are officially pissing me off.

Look, we expect the weather to be somewhat variable in the early spring, but SNOW in APRIL? Snow that lasts for two days, as well? C'mon, don't you think we've suffered enough? It's bad enough that I've already gotten used to throwing the kids in the car with little more than their tennis shoes and sweatshirts on. Now you make me drag the boots, mittens, and hats back out of hiding; force me to let the car seat belts out once again to accommodate for those puffy winter coats; turn those nice spring puddles into icy slush that is guaranteed to make my kids sick. (Again.) Don't you see how much we all appreciated the warmer temperatures, sunny skies, and dryer ground? Don't you see how, the minute you re-create these wet winds and grey skies, my kids got crabbier, the house got smaller, and poor little Ava has that awful rash again, breaking out around her nose and mouth due to her rubbing, runny nose, and your stiff winds? Didn't you see how hopeful we were when our children ran themselves silly in circles on the dry lawn, happily rode their bicycles up and down the clean roads, and admired and exclaimed over the spring flowers that were poking their heads up hopefully through our gardens?

I'm starting to feel like this relationship is unbalanced, Mother Nature. After all, we are committed to making things as easy on you as possible, too. We've been avid recyclers for years and have made "greener" living choices long before it became fashionable to do so. We try to teach our children the wonders you have to offer, and to respect the gifts you have given us. Don't you think that, in return, you could cut us a little slack? We're not asking for miracles, Mother Nature. We don't necessarily need weather in the 70's with perfect sunny skies. (Not that we'd complain about those, though!) All we're asking for is the 50's back, Mother Nature. Just 20 little 'ole degrees, and a break in the grey clouds for more than an hour a week (and if you could manage this by tomorrow morning so we don't have to cancel our outdoor Easter egg hunt, we'd be truly grateful for that consideration.)

We really aren't ready to deal with winter again, Mother Nature, so could you please stop teasing us and do what you know you HAVE to do eventually? Give us our spring back?


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