...Oh, NO, she didn't!!

For the past few months I have been "collecting" sayings, phrases, and questions that my preschooler has either repeated, or come up with on her own. Once again, I would like to send out a very immature "I told you so" to people who criticized me for teaching Liesl ASL as a baby, fearing that her prowess with sign language would inhibit her speech. Yeah, we're beyond that. Oops...I mean, "YES, we're beyond that." (Explanation of that in a moment.)

DISCLAIMER! Those of you who know me well know that, on occasion, I am prone to exaggeration for dramatic purposes. I promise you, each and every one of these incidents is 100% true.

Read on...

* Liesl took her children's Bible into the grocery store with us. While we were checking out, she told the cashier--who was obviously Jewish--the following story: "This is my Bible. Baby Jesus was born in this Bible. Then He turned into a hippo."

* Mommy: "Liesl, you are not allowed to go downstairs by yourself right now."
Liesl (in a defiant tone): "Well, Mommy, ACTUALLY, I am."

* With our Pastor in our church, after seeing Liesl wearing an MSU sweatshirt:
Pastor: "Yeah, Liesl!"
Liesl: "We say 'YES,' not 'YEAH,' Pastor."

* In the car, after I roused her early from her nap to take her to my teaching job:
Liesl: "I'm tired."
Mommy: "I'm sorry, is it because I woke you early?"
Liesl: "Yes. You're starting to annoy me a little bit."

* At the same teaching gig, a roomful of conservative Christian moms who homeschool their children:
Another Kid (pointing at Ava): "Ooooo...look at the BABY!"
Liesl: "I have a baby in my tummy."

* After a particularly good violin practice session:
Mommy: "You're my little violinist!"
Liesl: "...No, I'm LIESL."

* With our friends Kelly and her children Emma and Jack, at dinner:
Kelly, Emma, and Jack, being Catholic, crossed themselves at prayer time.
Liesl (shouting joyously): "Happy Hanukkah!"

* When her Uncle Robert and future Aunt Karen, both University of Illinois fans:
Robert and Karen: "Liesl, say 'Go Illini'"
Mommy: "No, Liesl, say 'Go State!'"
Robert and Karen: "Go Illini!"
Liesl: "This is making me a little bit upset."

* When Ava was trying to take a toy out of Liesl's hands:
Liesl: "I would say 'no' to you, but I'm not your parent."

* After accidentally knocking a pile of books off of a table:
Liesl: "That was totally my fault."

* When I came home from a particularly good violin lesson:
Mommy: "Liesl, Mommy started learning vibrato today!"
Liesl: "Rock on, Mommy."

* When Ava tore a page out of my favorite cookbook:
Liesl: "You are so busted."

* After accepting a cracker that I offered to her:
Liesl: "Thank you for this delightful cracker."

* Random conversation with me:
Liesl: "After I’m 4, I’ll be big enough."
Mommy: "Big enough for what?"
Liesl: "Big enough to be 4."

* While I was preparing lunch, after sweeping up a mess of delightful cracker crumbs off of the floor, Liesl picked up the broom and proceeded to "help" me finish the sweeping job by scattering the delightful cracker crumbs across the floor:
Mommy: "Liesl, please move out of the way, I'm trying to prepare lunch."
Liesl: "Well, I'm trying to finish my work, but you keep stepping in it."